Why is it that we all seem to have the worst time with commitment?

I will admit that commitment is not my strongest suit.  I commit to the wrong things and stay committed for far longer than I should.

Many people I know also have trouble with commitment.

And it really makes me wonder.  What is it about commitment that is so hard nowadays?

It used to be that you would make plans and you would stay committed to those plans and work around the big plan for your smaller plans.

Now, it’s much harder to make even small plans.  Friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, family members, etc.  It doesn’t matter who it is (and I am included in this as well).  We are hesitant to commit to plans these days.

I have asked friends to do simple things like commit to a food truck rodeo or take a day trip a couple hours away and I can’t get an answer.  I have asked guys to do something and they have said I don’t know, only to text me later that day and say, come over and hang out (right now).  I have asked family to make plans (and I may have asked too early) for holidays, only to have no response at all.

I understand that we are all busy these days and many of us are over-scheduled.  BUT, I firmly believe that we make time for the things that are important to us.  Work notwithstanding (since we all need to be able to pay our bills), I wonder what keeps us from committing like we used to.

Why is it so hard to say to a friend: yes, I’d love to go to that event with you, let’s meet at x time so that we can get lunch first?  Why is it so hard for a family member to say: yes, let’s pick names for Christmas instead of getting gifts for everyone?  Why is it so hard for a guy to say: yes, let’s hang out/go to dinner/see each other at this time on this date?

Are we all waiting for something better?  Are we all so unsure of ourselves that we have to feel like it’s the best option every time and make sure we aren’t missing out on something different?  Is our fear of missing out on things so strong that we just don’t commit at all?

Like I said, I am guilty of this as well.  I am as much a homebody as anyone.  I want to know people that are going to things I’m going to and I don’t always like to go by myself.  I won’t make firm plans if I feel like something better will come along.  But I do still make plans.

Of course, there is a whole other side of commitment as well – showing up for ourselves.  Stay tuned later this week for a post on that.  And thanks for sticking with me during this time of non-commitment to my blog.  I’m hoping to change that some.

Do you commit to plans easily or do you hold out for something better?  What makes you do that?  Any insight on what I said today?


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