My Life

My life has been a mess lately.  As evidenced by:

My inability to get back to a normal sleep schedule.  One hour time change and one night out should not throw me off this much.  Of course, I’ve been sick (and think it’s finally clearing up) and have been amping up my running mileage as well.  I think I need to find more things to keep me motivated to work and stay awake rather than nap – because when I nap, I don’t sleep at night and I head into another vicious cycle of not being able to sleep on a normal schedule (which I desperately need).

My inability to be motivated to do any work for school.  I am throwing things together last minute – things that I think are good and interesting, but that could probably be better.  I know that a break is coming up and things will get better, but it’s been hard.

My inability to make my bed.  It means that I’m not really ready for my day and it also makes me anxious to see it when it’s not made.  It doesn’t take that long to throw the covers over.  And now that I’ve cleaned my bed off at least a little bit, it’s even easier – but I didn’t make my bed again this morning.

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I also still have all of these creative urges to get things down on paper and in photographs and I am attempting to make something that will help me cope with not having a job come June 30th.  But I’m having a hard time with it.  I am just so unmotivated lately…and I need to find what has been blocking me and crush it.  Because this crippling inability to get anything done just makes me feel worse.

I have to go – it’s time to face the world again.  Students are waiting, teachers have questions and my time is taken up again already.

[ps] There is a possibility for a winter storm to hit us today.  I hope it does it right or doesn’t come at all because I would not be okay with it screwing up my afternoon and not giving me the opportunity to stay home in bed for a day.

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