Wicked Wedding

[side note: I mean wicked in the good way here, not the bad way]

In one week, my twin brother is getting married.  I have mixed feelings about this.  I love who he is getting married to and I’m really excited to “gain” another sister in my family tree.  But, I can’t help but compare myself to him.

There are so many exciting things that have to do with weddings and large family gatherings.  And weddings are a great reason to get everyone together and to have a big party.  And this will be a big party and I’m sure we will all have a great time.

I’m excited to have had the opportunity to buy a new dress and I love what I purchased.  I have an excuse to get dressed up and have a really great time before a year that is going to be a whirlwind.  An excuse to see my family and to talk with people about the year that is coming and everything that is going to be happening.

But excitment can only go so far.  I am also apprehensive about the wedding.  Because as much as I know we are two separate people, it’s hard to not compare myself to him.  I think that on a subconscious level, I’ve always compared myself to him.  When we were going away to college, I told him that I got first pick because I was smarter and he couldn’t go to the same school as me.  I was half joking.  Sort of.  We did not end up going to the same school, but we did end up going close in the end.  And we didn’t really see each other very often.

I’ve had friends get married.  I was in my best friend’s wedding.  And there are a lot of people my age who are married and/or have kids.  But it really is just different when it’s your twin brother.  Because I am nowhere near that area of my life.  I don’t even know if I’m ready to be in a serious, commited relationship – let alone talking about marriage.

I think what I’m most excited is about the family getting together.  We will have almost all of the siblings together.  It seems so weird to know that the six of us (have I mentioned that I am one of six) don’t really all see each other at the same time anymore.  Usually we can get four or five together without too much of a horrible problem, but that last one or two is usually pretty tricky.  And we won’t have everyone at the wedding.

My oldest brother has opted to not come to the wedding.  I understand that not all families are very close – and we aren’t all that close, I guess.  But I never thought we were apathetic enough to not attend a big event like this.  And if he were actually doing what he originally thought he’d be doing, it would be fine.  But he’s going to spend time with a friend, instead of being at his brother’s wedding.  I don’t understand it.  I guess it’s the difference between boys and girls striking again.

Lots of thoughts.  But on that note, I am going to take the week to not blog.  I am hoping to get some things done for my classroom.  Maybe do some school shopping.  And then I’ll be out of town for the wedding.  And then school starts.  So, I’m taking a week off to really recharge.

Thoughts?  Comments?  I promise to try and respond quickly.

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