I wrote yesterday about how I had gained weight and now I am going to write about weight sort of in general. And my feelings about this week sort of in general.
I never thought I would be that girl that got caught up in things and got upset when things didn’t go my way with my weight. But I had never stated that I was losing weight and put a goal in my head that is totally attainable, but going to be very hard to get to.
I thought that if I were working out and eating healthier, I would be better and I wouldn’t worry about it.
And I didn’t. For a while. Because the weight was coming off.
But this past week, the weight didn’t come off. It actually came back on. And my clothes aren’t feeling super tight or anything. But they aren’t feeling super loose either.
And I think I’ve gotten discouraged. Because I was doing so well and then I wasn’t. Because I really want to lose this weight and I am feeling like it might be harder than I thought it would be. Because it’s not easy like it has been. Because I wanted to reach another goal by the time I was seeing a friend and I won’t.
And I’ve felt pretty crappy this week. I’ve felt tired and like I’m not doing enough. Maybe I should weigh myself and see if I’ve dropped anything – to assure myself that I am not gaining weight. But I don’t want to become obsessive (yes, I realize that I am sounding a bit obsessive by writing this).
And I don’t know if my crappy mood is because it turned incredibly cold again after a brief spell of summer. Or if it’s because I’ve felt really tired. Or if it’s because I gained weight.
Hopefully, next week will be better. Because I have big plans for next week. Plans that I have been thinking about and been happy about for so long. And I’m sorry that I haven’t put up pictures. First it was that I wasn’t subbing/didn’t have time to get them on my computer to upload them. Now, it’s that I’ve been feeling bad so I haven’t taken them off my camera. I will do a pictures post tomorrow, Friday. And that might be it. We’ll see how I’m feeling.
Do you ever feel down? Do you think my weight gain is a cause of my feeling down or do you think I’m just perseverating? Do you have any ways that I can switch things up with my weight loss routine to keep things fresh and keep me from getting discouraged – even if I do gain weight?