I don’t know if you’ve read the book about Alexander. And I don’t know if those are exactly the right words – in exactly the right order – in exactly the same language. But we all know that it goes something like that. It’s one of my favorite books and during college I kept it in a drawer so that I could read it when I was having a bad day because, ironic as it may be, it would make me feel a little better.
Yesterday was one of those days. It was just awful. It really started Wednesday night. My brake light came on as I was coming home from my friend’s house. Let me start by saying that I knew my brakes were bad. I knew they were going to need to be replaced and I was putting it off. Well, yesterday, I finally didn’t have a choice. Because that brake light came on.
Wednesday night, I was a mess. Thursday morning I was a mess. I cried and I yelled and I was angry. A part of me felt like apologizing because I had yelled, but a bigger part of me didn’t want to because I didn’t want to invalidate my feelings – which, still in my mind, are completely plausible and something that need to be addressed. I did my yoga, but it didn’t calm me down or make me feel better. It just made me feel like I was wasting time that I could use to do other things, like try to figure out how I was going to pay for my car.
It was bad. I got my car to the shop as soon as it opened and heard from them within an hour. It was both worse and better than I could have expected. My brakes did need to be replaced. I essentially had no back brakes at all and my front brakes were pretty rough as well. I’m thankful that I didn’t get in an accident because it is entirely possible that it could have happened.
Thanks to a coupon that they put on for me and the fact that I went somewhere that had warrantied my pads (thanks, Monro! And me for not remembering but going there anyway), my car repairs cost me $953.11 – a savings of something like $350ish (because of the coupons and warranty).
Then the anger came back in. My car is basically the family car. I take my brother to work, which is fine because I am living at home rent free. What isn’t fine is that I always put the gas in the car. I always pay the repairs (although I put this last jaunt on my Goodyear credit card and not sure how I’m paying it off yet). I always make sure that I can drive it. I sometimes don’t do things so that it’s available.
My older brother bought a car recently – maybe a year ago. It’s a beat up jeep that’s holding up well enough. He didn’t pay for it – he didn’t even pay for half of it. His insurance is under my mom’s name, as is my other brothers insurance. He never lets anyone use his car without making a huge stink (I know it’s ironic because I am complaining now).
Anyways. The day wasn’t completely awful and my car got into the shop and fixed. But I was drained. I’m not sure how I’ll pay for the repairs (I guess I’ll manage, even if I have to use my tax refund, which I had other plans for). So, I didn’t go anywhere to access the internet yesterday so I didn’t write a post.
Another post to come later probably because I am subbing today and I will have time to write one more about my day and weekend.
Have you ever had a really awful day? Do you have money troubles? How was your day yesterday? Tips and recommendations to make myself happier without blowing up at my family (as that makes me feel guilty afterwards?)